Friday, August 04, 2006

LOL!!!


I found this picture while looking for Britney Pictures and had to put it up...

Britney Spears Baby Safety Night?


MSNBC reports that a minor league baseball team is having a Britney Spears baby Safety Night where if you dress up as a baby or bring a baby, you get in for free. Poor Brit can't buy a break. She's dropped that kid and had it sit in her lap while driving but it's just the we don't understand beacause, as she put it to Matt Lauer, “I did it with my dad. I’d sit on his lap and I drive...We’re country.”

Up next at the Ballpark: Magic Johnson Safe Sex Night.

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Tea Partay

I T in the parlor...

Tags:

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Elton John wants more Flair


The AP reports that Elton John hates the way American Bands dress.

"........I think it's good that some American bands are beginning to do that, but it's still very rare for bands to make a real effort. So when you get groups like The Killers and Scissor Sisters who come along, it's thrilling. I'm so over the tattoos and the T-shirts and rings through the noses. It's not pretty, it's not pleasant, it's not exciting. Please stop it now."

Obviously Elton knows fashion. Just look at him in the above picture...and no one could play the piano while dressed as Donal Duck like he could. So don't listen to him American Bands, Sir Elton probably thinks it is poor fashion unless you can sing with a ball gag in your mouth while wearing ass-less chaps anyway.

One Month....

One month from today until the pads start cracking for opening weekend of college football. I can't wait to lose a ton of money gambling on teams I don't care or know anything about. Online gambling accounts should require a sobriety test before submitting bets. Some highlights from week 1 include: Miami vs. Florida State, Notre Dame @ Ga. Tech, Washington St vs Auburn, Arkansas vs USC.

LL borrows Xtina's Clothes

Apparently Lohan borrowed some clothes from Xtina yesterday. She may not work very hard on the movie set or in the recording studio, but she has done a nice job molding those fun bags.

Carmen Elektra would rather f*ck this...


On MSNBC today, Dennis Rodman says that the reason Carmen Elektra left Dave Navarro is because she isn't over the Worm yet........It is hard to blame her. Just look at Rodman. Some call him the sexiest man of our generation and they are probably right.

That said, can it get any worse for Dave Navarro?? Your career has spiraled into being on the show Rock Star SuperNova and now this. I'm placing 10-1 odds that the next place we find Dave is in a cheap airport hotel with a bottle of booze and a penis, I mean pistol in his mouth.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Thug "U"


The University of Miami, known amongst it's cocky atheletes as simply "the U," has suspended four football players for their opening game against Florida State. Every year we are reminded just how thug their football team can be, but it also reminds of our all time favorite Hurricane off-the-field issue: The Seventh Floor Crew Need Volume.

The Professional


Miami Dolphins Defensive End Jason Taylor says there won't be any locker room problems even though he is getting divorced from teammates Zach Thomas's sister.

"As far as the question about the locker room, to be quite frank, I think it's ridiculous to me that anyone would even think that," Taylor said. "We're professionals, guys."

Thomas is indeed the consummate professional. There was no problem in the locker room when his sister was getting gored out by the 6'6" African-American Taylor with no doubt a nine inch dong, and there will be no problem now.

Mama Lohan Strikes back


I'm sure you all recall that everyone's favorite party girl, Lindsay Lohan was reprimanded last week by the CEO of Morgan Creek Productions for missing a little too much work due to "Heat exhaustion."

Well, MSNBC reports today that Dina Lohan was not happy about her daughter being called out. In an interview with Ryan Seacrest Lite, aka Billy Bush, Dina said that the executive was "out of line" for the letter.

Out of line?? Out of Line?? I'll tell you what is out of line: it's Lindsay's mom looking like more of a strung out coke slut than Lindsay---and that has to take a lot of work. Just look at this woman. Would anyone be surprised if this was what showed up to perform at your buddies bachelor party?? Rooow!

Kid Rock Splunking Accident??

Thanks to Splashnewsonline.com for the pic.

Xtina is a Philanthropist...

...of her melons. I am slowly falling in love with this woman. In addition to her new see-through wardrobe, she recently told Seventeen magazine that she plans to open a shelter for victims of domestic abuse

Mel's Mug Shot


The Smoking Gun has released Hitler's, uh I mean, Mel Gibson's mugshot from last Thursday night. Nice buzz Braveheart!

Monday, July 31, 2006

OH GOD! OH MY FREAKING GOD!


USAToday.com is reporting that a Fresno, CA area radio station recently changed it's format from Christian radio to Porn radio. "all sex radio, all the time."

I don't know what significance this has, if any, except I'm sure there were a few really surprised devout Christians riding to work the morning they made the switch, expecting to get their Jesus on and instead hearing the slurping sounds of a blow job. What I do know is that those of you in the Fresno area need to be extra careful on the highways now because drive and beats have become way more enticing. Fresno here I come!!!

Source:http://www.usatoday.com/news/offbeat/2006-07-27-sexradio_x.htm?csp=34

Miami Vice is Number 1


Everyone, including me, saw Miami Vice this weekend as it overtook Pirates of the Caribbean as the number one movie.

In related news, everyone, including me, is a sucker. If you are a fan of the show, don't see this movie. Colin Farrell's best acting job has been making everyone believe that he is actually some tough roughneck. In actuality he's a silver spooned brat from an affluent Irish Family. Jaime Foxx did an ok job, but I still think they should have given Don Johnson some botox and lipo-suction, found Philip Michael Thomas, and set the movie in the '80's.

Whether watching it on the big screen or doing it yourself, snorting coke, blowing stuff up, and banging exotic women is so much more fun when you're listening to Flock of Seagulls than it is when listening to Audio Slave


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