Friday, June 23, 2006

Jenn Sterger in Playboy

The NSFW version of the pic is here.

Speaking of Jenn, here is a great story from a blog where her dad and the blogger get into a fight over whether or not she is "everything that is wrong with America."

Rollin' with Saget

Bob Saget Bitch, you better ask someone!

Friday Penguin

Eastern Motors Commercial

Jean Claude Van Damme Dancing

It's Friday Bitches!

Adriana Lima is Hot




This is quite possibly the most beautiful girl on th earth.

Just saying...

Facebook Picture of the Day

Dirrty


Love what the ladies are doing this summer. You know you got a good thing going when your shorts stop above your vaja-jay.

The Thundering Herd


For a school that has produced stand-up gentlemen like Randy Moss and Jason Williams this story is shocking. Cheerleading at Marshall is fun

Nose Job for Jessica?


Looks like she may have followed in her little sisters footsteps.

Flaming Richard Pryor

What a clown!

Is David Spade Hung like a Moose?



He must be. Heather Locklear has been tunneled out by so many guys that if Spade were not packing some kind of heat, than the fling would have folded months ago. That being said, way to go David Spade. The once sidekick of the late Chris Farley and star of such shitty movies as Dickie Roberts: Fromer Child Star and Joe Dirt is really stepping it up. No one has ever doubted his humor, but his game with women was another story.

Britney going Goth



Just when you thought Britney couldn't get any more less attractive, she goes out and dies her hair black. Are you and your new baby heading to a Nine Inch Nails or Marilyn Manson concert? Step it up now, so we can perve on your redneck ass again.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

The New Daisy Duke



Taking Jessica Simpson's spot as Daisy Duke in the new Dukes of Hazard movie would be no easy task, but it appears to me they have cast this one just fine. Ladies and Gents, April Scott

Timberlake gives the Heisman


Justin Timberlake has recently broken off ties with long time girlfriend Cameron Diaz. He recently is about to start his world tour. I'm not sure of his destinations, but if he is going to Asia he must be in the know. As for Cameron, she is apperantly devastaed by the news.

The japanese are have less sex WTF?


The Japanese birth rate has hit an all time low of 1.25 babies per female lifetime. A recent survey has attributed this phenomenon to a lack of sex. All I can say to that, is what the hell is wrong with these people? Start droppin the hammer.
Link:

Babes of the World Cup

A few more can't hurt

More Korean Dimes


Swedish Fan with a touch of Asian

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Monk-e-Mail

Send your friends a Monk-e-Mail and hand select a special monkey to deliver a verbal message to them. Its pretty addictive, and remember to tun your sound up...

World Cup Part 3









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Invisible

Good work out of her Doc.

Brazil Wins World Cup!

Can anyone top that?!

Idiots behind the wheel

Amazing

Lohan vs Diddy


I can understand getting in a tussle with Paris Hilton and that egg Brandon Davis, but P-Diddy??? Who in the fuck does Lindsay Lohan think she is? Last I heard, she isn't even old enough to get in to bars, let alone demand tabels from uberrappers that own the whole city. Hot picture though, I'll give her that.

Jiggaman vs Cristal part II



In honor and respect for that ninja Jay-z, I am officially changing my screenname from Captain Cristal to Kaptain Krug after this most recent article about the feud between the Jiggaman and Cristal's CEO Federic Rouzard in the
New York Post

Paris Takes Down another Sport Star



Apparently, Paris Hilton was seen heading back to her hotel room with Colorado Avalanche Goalie, Jose Theodore after the Much Music Awards in Toronto. Sniff or Sex do you ask? Most likely both. For more info go to link

Man Tries to Pay his Bar Tab with the Bartenders Checkbook



A 21 year old man in Statesboro, Georgia was arrested for trying to pay his 123$ bar tab with a checkbook he "found" at the bar. Unfortunately for him, the bartender was quick to realize that is was, in fact, his own checkbook the man was attempting to use. I gotta give this guy credit for such a ballsy move, but lets be honest here, probably not going to be a Rhodes scholar.

Link

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Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Lollygagger Cruisington's Favorite Words



1. Poppycock- nonsense, rubbish

2. Haberdasher- a dealer in men’s clothing

3. Summer/Prep- my two favorite verbs

4. Lewd- evil or wicked... but you can use it as saying you had a big night of fun... "dude, last night was lewd!"

5. Rooted-slang for fucked up. I was rooted last night.

Carrey Tries to Kill McCarthy

Apparently the rumors about Jim Carrey and Jenny McCarthy are true and you only need a picture of Jim Carey trying to stab his tongue through the back of Jenny McCarthy's neck to prove it. She and her fake hoots are under-dating.

Christina Aguilera - Ain't No Other Man

Her total domination of Britney continues...

State of North Carolina's First Professional Championship




While my esteemed colleague could care less about it (perhaps cause he knows nothing about hockey and is a bitter bitter Panthers/Bobcats/Hornets fan) I think that this win by the Hurricanes will have a lasting effect not just on the triangle area but on the state as a whole. While 18-25 yr olds will never embrace hockey there is a fan base among 8-15 yr olds that are hockey crazy and will be for the rest of their lives due to the Stanley Cup run this year as well as in 2002. Regardless North Carolina is once again the epicenter of the sports world.... now lets take Omaha!

Look who else is in on Redneck Hockey! Woo! Woo!

Simpson in Maxim



She has definately looked better, but not complaining.
More pics at Popsugar

Ronaldinho: Touch of Gold

Just in case you were not sure who the best player in the world is. Watch this video

The Chinese want cheap boners



The Chinese are appealing the recent government ruling that sided with pharmaceutical giant, Pfizer, on the issue of upholding patent rights for the impotence drug, Viagra. Looks like these guys value cheap sex over good relations with large bureaucratic corporations. Can't say I blame them.

Link


Landon Donovan's Spanish is not up to par



Apparently, Donovan was reprimanded for answering a Spanish reporter's question back in Spanish. I mean give the guy a break for attempting to adapt to a foreign culture.

Link


Asian Dime of the week: Jennifer Belle



Just want to congratulate Philippino lingerie model, Jennifer Belle, for becoming Awsometowns first asian dime of the week. Love your work

Monday, June 19, 2006

World Cup 2006: USA v. Italy

In case you missed it, here are the highlights of the USA v. Italy matchup.

Come on Mischa



Someone please get Mischa Barton a hamburger...and while your at it, get her a new boyfriend too. Her taste in men is dispicable. She has gone from that rehabing clown Brandon Davis to the wildly unsuccessful Cisco, who according to Lowdown has only sold 812 copies, WORLDWIDE, of his new album that came out in the middle of May! I am pretty sure that means his immediate family and friends are the only people to purchase his album. Tighten up Marissa!

File this under Death and Taxes....





(Please note: The reason I left Phil's picture above the cyber perv is that there are four definites in life: death, taxes, cyber stalkers on college community websites, and Phil choking away US Opens on Sundays)

It was only a matter time before Facebook would have its first cyber stalker/perv case, low and behold its some kid living in his parents basement in Queens and going to Hunter College (aka community college). Elvin Chung was able to convince a bunch of coeds that he was a long lost pal form high school and was in a studio art class and needed some nude photos to finish a project or he would lose his scholarship. While Elvin obviously has some issues, these dumb sluts sending "an old classmate" naked pics really need some help, as do their neglectful parents.

Link: Facebook perv

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The Good Ol' Days.....

Over the past few years the only drugs you hear about in professional sports seem to be steroids, human growth hormones (HGH), and other performance enhancing drugs. Well I want to take you back to the good ol' days of recreational drugs and their place in the pros. Our friends over at NoMas.com decided to put together a great timeline of the players who used and abused during their career here are my top 3:

#1- In 1970 Pittsburgh Pirates pitcher Dock Ellis throws a no-hitter will tripping on LSD......seriously! Listen to how he describes it: "The ball was small sometimes, the ball was large sometimes, sometimes I saw the catcher, sometimes didn't. Sometimes I tried to stare the hitter down and throw while I was looking at him. I chewed my gum until it turned to powder. They say I had about three to four fielding chances. I remember diving out of the way of a ball I thought was a line drive. I jumped, but the ball wasn't hit hard and never reached me."

What the fuck were the hitters on in that game?!

#2- Montreal Expos- The entire team was on crack,even their star rookie Tim "Rock" Raines who famously said, "I had it in little gram bottles that I kept in my pocket, when I carried it in my pocket, I'd go in head first.


#3- In 1985 the Pittsburgh Pirates' mascot named "Pirate Parrot" was named in a federal suit involving a cocaine ring, that included famous MLB stars Keith Hernandez (of Seinfeld fame), the aforementioned Tim Raines, Lonnie Smith, and Dave Parker. It was rumoured that the Parrott kept the cocaine stash in his beak during the games for players to use.

Check out the entire time line.... some really funny shit

link: Recreational Drug Use in Professional Sports


The NCAA Hates Poor People


Why is it that Jeff Samardzija and Tom Zbikowski are allowed to sign contracts for other sports and stay on the gridiron to play football for the Irish? Something tells me that if these two dudes didn't go to Notre Dame and didn't have Touchdown Jesus looking down on them this would not fly. WWTJD?

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